Life sucks, nothing works, stress in work, personal life in shambles, no friends, unrealized dreams, unrealistic expectations, harsh realities… relatable? It is the story of every professional who has been around for some time. Life passes by, dreams become passe… reality is reduced to existence … and one tends to live one day at a time. Getting up, going to the office, working, coming back, cooking, and then off to sleep. And the same thing starts again the next day.
The reason that I am putting this on paper is because I see this happening all around me…… whether it is friends, cousins, or colleagues. My happy-go-lucky, go-getter friends and acquaintances are getting anxiety attacks or depressive bouts though they seemingly have no reason to have them.
When things do not go the way, one wants them to or there are uncertainties or chaos in personal or professional life, this happens to each one of us, including me. It makes us question our existence and brood over the future. By default, as pessimists, we imagine the worst, though the probability of the worst happening is equivalent to it not happening at all. We tend to ignore that aspect and keep over thinking about the future and the perils it can bring.
If any one of us can say with a hand on our heart that this has not hit them then it’s either they are blessed or are lying to themselves. Once the late thirties hit, the future somehow becomes the focus of our over thinking and the present becomes mundane. The future is unknown and unfathomable, maybe a section of us won’t even have one… we may leave this world before old age hits us or before we retire. Living 100 years is not guaranteed rather in the current state of affairs with high-stress jobs, polluted food, and air, what to say of 100 we may not even reach a 50, so why think so much…. why worry so much?
I am not some baba preaching moksha and nirvana, I am just one of you plagued by uncertainties and thinking of a bleak future that may not even happen.
Life for almost everyone is a routine, you are no exception. “Happiness” is a mirage and though all of us seek it, do we have a clue what it is?
My two cents here is to focus on what you have, dream but defer to fate. Over time one realizes that fate is a reality and it will play a role in our life. But can we influence it?? If not, what is the point of worrying about it? If you like watching a play, go ahead and watch it. A big bucket of Biryani is what you crave, go ahead, and have it. These momentary nuggets of happiness are to be savored and they will constitute the memories that you look back on. A tough day at work, a missed promotion, a low raise, or even a layoff would not even find a space in your life’s journey whenever you would sit back and reminisce on the last 35 or even more years of your life.
Work is an important part of our life but is it life itself? We need money no doubt but aren’t we capable of finding another livelihood if this one goes kaput? Friends usually disappear in 30’s to 50’s as everyone is busy with their lives but can’t we give work colleagues a chance to be our buddies? Loneliness is a reality for most professionals as they stay alone, away from families ……but can it be helped? If not, accept it and move on. Late marriages, high divorce rates, and delinquent children… are realities plaguing a plethora of people, so why do you feel that you are the only one. Each and every person on planet Earth has something to be unhappy about, a dream that remained unfulfilled, a life that is a struggle, a livelihood to be earned….accept it, each human has his or her own struggles. So should all of us stop living??
Is that really an option? We are wired to be fighters… try holding your breath for 2 minutes, you won’t be able to…. So, stop overthinking, stop being a martyr, and just live your life… spend your days with a smile, you never know which day is going to be your last. Don’t waste it by burdening yourself with depressive thoughts or thinking about people or stuff that doesn’t warrant your attention.
So just follow one motto in life —live it. You have no control over it anyways so stop worrying about work, people, society, stress……and focus on anything and everything that can make you smile……………………
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